Whenever in doubt

I don't know why I titled this post that. I am usually unsure as to what to title these posts but no one reads this but me and a few friends, so I'm not sure why I bother with it too much. Anyway, just a quick bit of info:
My brother died 12/26/08~I didn't go to the funeral, I didn't want to be subjected to everyone's questions, even though I should have been strong enough to handle them all. I did say goodbye to him. My thoughts are strange on the whole affair.
I've changed jobs, I'm going back into geriatric nursing. There is still something I have to learn from that. The job, part-time 3rd shift, loading boxes on trucks, taught me about people, even though I only had it for 6 months. You can learn from things, people every minute of every day.
I have "found" people on the internet from high school, I don't want to get into the whole "friends" thing so I'm trying to restrain and refrain my desire for attention. Pathetic.
I'm trying to learn from my mistakes that I make daily but it's not working very well for me. I look back over the last year, and there have been many. What could I say I've learned from this past year? That I am not as humble as I need to be in order to evolve further. My ego is still so big that I'm not learning very well.

I'm sure some people come to Blogger to read about interesting people, or for sex or for learning about things, but if they stumble upon here, they find my self-absorbed ass, going on about me. Hmmm, maybe that should be my next goal. Not worrying about making friends, being interesting to anyone or giving a fuck.